Regret

I'm not sure how I feel about this emotion. In some cases, I think it's good to regret because it reminds you not to go down that path or make that choice again. That being said, for me it is also an emotion that is hard to overcome. I was looking through my old pictures yesterday and came across some of an old friend of mine. That person is one of my biggest regrets. I dreamed about it all night. I truly don't think there is anything more I can do to try and make restitution, so there's no sense dwelling on it, right? Ah, but therein lies my problem - how do I rid myself of this feeling of regret? This person meant SO much to me and became a major casualty in the stage of my life where I was like a roller coaster/ping pong ball going from one thing to another - not sure of anything. No this wasn't an old boyfriend, but a dear friend whom I hurt deeply. Most of the time I can ignore this area of regret in my life, but there are times that I am truly pained by it. I wish there was more I could do, but I fear it is simply impossible to do anything else...

Perhaps it is just one of the many human experiences that make this life what it is and perfects us. I guess I just keep praying this feeling of regret will go away...maybe I am just selfish and just want to have some peace of mind. I just want to meet up with this person and have a good long talk and personally ask for forgiveness. I wish it were possible. Maybe it's something that will just have to wait until we are on the other side.

Regret is interesting. I'm not entirely sure how to shake it off, realizing that it isn't right to dwell on such things. This person probably doesn't even care one bit anymore and has rightfully moved on and forgotten all about it. Although I think sometimes it's easier to forget and forgive if you are the offended rather than being the offender. It's harder to forgive myself than it is to forgive others.